The "I Bought Too Much Cream Cheese" Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

"I Bought Too Much Cream Cheese" Chocolate Chip Cookies

Ingredients

4 oz butter (1 Stick)
8 oz cream cheese (1 average package)
1 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup white sugar
2 eggs
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
2 1/2 cup flour
2 cups chocolate chips (or whatever)
1 tsp vanilla (if you have it or not if like me, you forgot to buy it at the grocery store last weekend)

Instructions

1. Cream butter, cream cheese, brown sugar and white sugar in the bowl of your mixer. This can be done with a hand beater, a standing mixer or by hand.

2. Crack eggs in a separate (preferably glass) bowl.

3. Search the egg for shell shards.

4. Stop to calm down your screaming nephew who wants to be the one who pours the eggs in the mixing bowl. But he cracked the eggs so the other nephew is the one that gets to pour in the eggs.

5. Help nephew pour eggs into mixing bowl.

6. Evict nephews from the kitchen.

7. Add salt, baking powder, flavor.

8. Add flour. Dough should not be dry or sticky but very soft.

9. Fill a 2 cup Elsa ziploc container with whatever you bought or have on hand (chips, Halloween M&Ms, chunks, chopped up chocolate).

10. Give Elsa container to nephew that is still complaining about the fact that he couldn't pour the egg in and help him pour the bits into the mixing bowl.

11. Lift your nephew so he can see in the bowl.

12. Look for your favorite disher. Realize the larger disher is in the dishwasher.

13. Get the smaller disher and load up a sheet tray.

14. Heat oven to 350.

15. When it's hot, get cooking.

16. Plant yourself on the couch and watch your new Beavis and Butthead DVDs (your nephews are gone) and you're depressed and that's why you decided to write a blog article anyway.

17. Decide the tiny disher is too small. Get one of those tablespoon measuring spoons your old boss gave you as a present.

18. Mash the cookies flat because cream cheese doesn't spread (and you realized you should have figured that out to begin with).

19. Take the cookies out before they get brown. If they're brown, they're burned. Maybe you like that. I don't know you. If you've read this far then you know what level of crazy you're dealing with. My ideal cookie is straight from the bowl. Raw dough, I mean. I know it's wrong but it's good.

20. Pull the cookies out of the oven after 10 to 15 minutes. They're still pale as death but with a bit of color around the edges.

21. Clean that kitchen up.